This month is a month of goodbyes and change for all of our family, but for some reason we've seen this most strikingly through our boys' eyes. Last day of school in Indiana. Last sleepover with close friends. Last snuggle with the family rabbit before he becomes a blessing to a little girl in another family. Last romp and stick-throwing session with our chocolate lab before giving her to a different family. Last time we sleep in "our beds."
None of these experiences are particularly easy for them. They're brave, and they willingly let go, but the pain is still real. And as a parent, that's so hard. I want to shelter them from that pain. I want to make this transition easier. I want to encourage them. But sometimes the tears are there, and the loss is real, and there aren't words that will wipe that away.
So instead of downplaying that pain, we sit with them, laughing and crying and share the pain with them. "I miss Lazarus [our rabbit], too. Do you remember the time he ate the computer cord and got quite a surprise? Goodbye, printer!" The amazing thing about our God is that he does the same thing. Although he is high and lifted up, exalted over all the earth and upholding the universe by the word of his power, he stoops down and anguishes with us. He is our shepherd King.
The other day I thought of Jesus' promise regarding living for the Kingdom of God: "And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name's sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life." (Matt. 19:29) But does that promise console a 6-year-old who misses his dog?
How do we encourage our kids to live with open hands? Not clinging with white knuckles to the things we have, but opening our hands and allowing the Lord to give and to take away? How do I foster that in my own life?
Remember the woman in Mark 14 who came to Simon's house, washed Jesus feet with her tears, dried them with her hair, and broke the expense flask of alabaster perfume on his head? One of the disciples estimates the perfume could have been sold for over $25,000. $25,000! Why was she willing to pour everything out for him? To break open the jar and not look back?
Because Jesus was her everything. He was the reason that her life had meaning. He was the rock that she could count on when everything around was shifting sand. He was her precious shepherd King. It wasn't that the perfume wasn't valuable. It was that Jesus was even more so.
May our boys learn that. May we learn that. That he is our breath and life. That he is our comforter and healer. That is our shepherd King. "He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters; he restores my soul... Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." (Ps. 23)
How have you experienced the Lord to be "more precious than silver... more costly than gold... and nothing [you] desire compares with [him]"?
You will learn it as you live it and your boys will learn it as they see you live it out. God never takes our sacrifices for granted. He values all that pain and sorrow and will ultimately give back way more than you have given up. Not another rabbit or dog perhaps, not the same kind of bed or the same "stuff" but whatever it is it will mean more to you than what you released ever did. You are all in my prayers and remember that true friends last even when you no longer live close and time has passed. May God continue to bless you all.
ReplyDeleteAnother young "missionary kid" who was friends with my children said that he was taught to remember that "nothing is sacred" and could not be left behind. He grew into a fine young man. Be encouraged; both you and your sons will be happy and blessed.
Thanks, Wendy! That's very encouraging to hear. We serve a God who is very faithful, and who knows our needs even better than we do. He uses all things for our good, even if we cannot see it now (or ever in this life). Thank you for your prayers!
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